Does a piano teacher have a right to talk to a child’s parents about how they learn?
Is this a tabu subject? Is this a private subject that a piano teacher has no right to discuss with parents? Do we risk upsetting them?
The truth is that neurodiverse people are often so intelligent that teachers (and parents) miss the fact that they’re struggling in some ways. After all, aren’t neurodiverse people somehow lacking? Wouldn’t it be more obvious?
Actually, no.
Children with ADHD can have exceptional intelligence, which means that when they struggle to organize their things or organize their practice time, it seems they’re just being lazy. It seems they’re full of potential but letting themselves down by not trying hard enough to meet it.
A piano teacher’s frustration builds over missed assignments, forgotten practice, slow progress and unfinished pieces. And when this pattern builds with a particularly talented student, the teacher can be at wits end. It may seem impossible to think of strategies that will help this student to try harder, or remember something, or follow through.
Once a teacher educates themselves on what neurodiversity looks like (and in this blog post we’re focusing on Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD), it will become easier to know how to help these special kids.
I feel that it’s important to avoid negative language surrounding neurodiversity and ADHD. Steer clear of articles and videos that cast ADHD people as deficient (unfortunately, these do exist). I’ve combed through YouTube to find videos that will help you learn from people who are living and thriving with ADHD and who celebrate their differences.
Each of the following videos is created by an expert. Dr. Thomas E. Brown offers an excellent overview from a psychologist’s point of view on ADHD and how the ADHD brain is different. Following are three videos from Jessica McCabe, who has some of the best ADHD content on YouTube right now. Her channel is called ‘How to ADHD’. The first is on potential, then her own personal journey of diagnosis, failure and success. She also covers how people try to help those with ADHD in ways that don’t actually help. Finally, I’ve added a video by Dr. Tracey Marks on time management, something those with ADHD truly struggle with. You may wish to continue her series on YouTube.
There’s a wealth of understanding that can be gained from each video, and I hope that you will make time to watch each one through.
Now, let the videos speak for themselves.
1. A closer look into ADHD – Dr. Thomas E. Brown
In the past, I didn’t think it was the piano teacher’s place to address neurodiversity in students. I thought classroom teachers would be better trained to pick up on it, and if a child had ADHD, it would already have been identified and the accommodations would already be in place.
However, classroom teachers and parents often only notice the hyperactive kind of ADHD in children. When a child can’t sit still or is constantly disruptive, or if they struggle to learn, these behaviours flag the child for diagnosis. These kids get help.
But there’s a whole other side to ADHD that teachers and parents routinely miss. It’s the children who have overactive imaginations, who are lost in their vibrant pretend worlds–who have more interesting things going on in their heads than are happening in the real world around them, who cannot pay attention–who don’t get diagnosed, and therefore don’t get help.
This is ADHD (Inattentive presentation). These quiet, intelligent, artistic children can end up in piano lessons.
2. You Have So Much Potential – How to HDHD
Quite often ADHD looks very different in girls than it does in boys. Whereas boys can be hyper and impulsive, girls can be dreamy and forgetful. This may be why boys are diagnosed more often than girls, and get more help earlier in their lives than girls.
Statistically, there are more girls in piano lessons, and also more female piano teachers. It is therefore possible that there’s a larger population of individuals with undiagnosed ADHD in the piano lesson world than in the general public.
3. Failing at Normal: An ADHD Success Story – Jessica McCabe
Another group that falls through the cracks is highly sensitive and artistic boys. Their ADHD is missed because many people believe incorrect stereotypes of what ADHD is.
Therefore, these quiet kids don’t get equal access to help. And they may go through life having to work harder than others, going through much steeper personal odds simply to cover the basics. Fighting their own inertia becomes exhausting, and it doesn’t have to be this way.
Because there may be a higher rate of ADHD in piano lessons, it’s very important for us piano teachers to educate ourselves on what it is. What are the currently known characteristics of ADHD? How do those with ADHD struggle? Are there ways for us to identify a student and develop helpful accommodations?
One thing is sure, when I looked further into ASD and ADHD, I became a much kinder teacher. The frustration I used to feel with common student ‘failures’ is now nearing zero.
4. 5 Ways People Try to Help Someone with ADHD
To be clear, it is not the place of any piano teacher to suggest a diagnosis to a parent, and certainly not to a child. This post isn’t about attempting to diagnose your piano students. Its purpose is simply to encourage you to become aware of the latest thinking on ADHD so that you might create your own in-house accommodations quietly and unobtrusively with children who might display some (or many) of the characteristics.
In essence, understanding ADHD might help you become a better piano teacher for a special segment of your student population.
5. How to Help Your Piano Students who are Not Reaching Their Full Potential
In November, 2023, Amy Chaplin invited me (Rebekah Maxner) to be a guest speaker on her Piano Pantry Podcast. My focus is on helping you understand students who may not be reaching their full potential. Some of these kids may be neurodiverse. I offer scenarios that are common frustrations to piano teachers with students who forget assignments or just can’t seem to get organized, followed by possible solutions. Check out Piano Pantry Podcast’s Episode 93 here.
6. A piano teacher can be a key player in getting kids help
As was said above, it isn’t the piano teacher’s job to diagnose or suggest a diagnosis for their piano students. Simply put, we aren’t qualified.
However, given the unique position that piano teachers hold, observing hundreds of children over the years and observing any single child over an expanse of time, you may begin to see patterns of behaviour in students in general, and patterns in a child in particular. Piano teachers may even catch traits that others miss.
In order to get children the help they need and deserve, there is a way to discreetly ask if parents are willing to hear from you about the way their child learns.
First, it might be best to ask parents in a general way, perhaps in a questionnaire that all parents fill out. This may remove any awkwardness later on if you notice characteristics in their child and are unsure how to open the conversation.
A questionnaire broaches the subject in a hypothetical way and asks for the parents’ permission for you to contact them should you notice anything about the way their child learns.
When a parent answers, “Yes,” they invite your input. When approaching the parent, you wouldn’t mention ASD or ADHD by name, but simply ask if they’ve noticed this or that about their child, and ask if they’ve ever considered having their child assessed. A parent wants the very best for their child and your sensitivity and observation might make a difference to them. In my own experience as a piano teacher, I’ve carefully approached several parents in this way and it has gone well. After the initial conversation, I then let them move forward with professionals who are qualified in assessment.
Please visit my Printables section for a FREE printable called Questionnaire for New Piano Parents. You may download a Word doc that you can edit, or a PDF.
It isn’t about giving a kid a label, it’s about helping them become understood and getting them the help they need.
7. Bonus: Need help with time management and organization?
>> Check out this sister post on Autism (ASD)
More than a classroom teacher, more than a sports coach and sometimes even more than a parent, a piano teacher holds a unique position in a child’s life. We observe the children in our studios in a very focused learning environment once a week. This blog post explores Autism (ASD) as a first step to help piano teachers know how to respond to neurodiversity in the piano studio environment. Link >> What every piano teacher needs to know about Autism (ASD)
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Video of the Week
Rock 3 (Early Intermediate, Level 3). Rock ‘n Roll style! Explores the E Major key signature in black and white key patterns that are easy to learn by rote, plus the eighth rest. Rock 3 is a pun on ‘rock’ music, a play on words of Rach 3 (the piano concerto), and the fact that we live on the third planet from the sun, (remember title of the TV series?). Rock 3 is available in the print and eBook Rock That Train, and as a studio-licensed eSheet!
